Synopsis

Meet Charlotte, a gothic writer, as she figures out that her misogynistic but charming boyfriend, Nigel, has been spying on her through the smart TV (I know! Right?). She decides to take a break from him and moves out, with her sassy writer’s Muses in tow. She rents a creepy old house at a discounted rate from sleazy estate agent, Scottt (yes, that’s three ‘t’s!), on the proviso that she doesn’t go in the attic. 

When her Muses sing their concerns (well, it is a musical) about the strange noises coming from the attic, Charlotte, like all good protagonists, goes straight up there to investigate. There, the attic reveals its secret: Lulu, a senile, albeit perfectly pickled and preserved flapper from the 1920s – “I never go out, and sunlight is ever so ageing, sweetie!”. Using the Muses as backup, Lulu conjures forth her younger self to show Charlotte how her husband, Albie, wooed her – only to lock her in the attic when she refused to give up her career to look after their unborn child.

As Lulu describes a decrepit bouquet from Albie as ‘the eternal roses’, Charlotte recognises it as an excellent title for her recently completed novel. However, on the way back from dropping the manuscript off at her agent, an apologetic Nigel approaches her and, with the help of a flash mob, asks her to marry him. Unsure (Stockholm Syndrome, anyone?), she returns to the attic, where Lulu shares that even after she was freed, she prefers life on the ‘inside’ because, if she leaves, another man will put her “right back up here”. She also reveals that Scottt, the estate agent with the three ‘t’s, is her son! (OMG!)

 Spoiler Alert!

Freaked out, Charlotte breaks up with Nigel (at long last!), telling him that she doesn’t want to end up like Lulu in the attic, who mysteriously is not there when Charlotte tries to show her to Nigel. After insisting that Charlotte’s imagination has run away with her, he appears to be confused at her story of his spying on her through the smart TV; “…but we never had a smart TV”. He then shows her a copy of her novel, ‘The Eternal Roses’, with his name as the author! Right about now, Charlotte questions her grasp of reality until she (but thankfully not the show!) completely loses the plot and takes her place as the madwoman in the attic. Then, Scottt and Nigel (what??? Nigel was in on it?), who both believe that it is much easier to control a woman when you know where she is, show the house to Olivia, a new prospective tenant. Once again, the rental is subject to the condition that she does not go up to the attic. And the Muses, fearful of being relegated to help TikTok creatives, advertise their availability.

Song List

Act One:

Muses For Hire

We Love Men

My Mother Was Right

A Place of My Own

Don’t Go Into the Attic

Clear Out

My Name in Lights

Ain’t it Swell

When it Was Good

You Get Me

Act Two:

Take Your Seat

Gonna Make You a Star

Behave

Freedom of Your Mind

Block Delete Move On

Falling Awake

Vicious Circle

Muses For Hire/ Don’t Go in The Attic – Mashup